How To Find the Caption for Your COVID Vaccine Selfie

Roll up your sleeve (singular) and follow these steps to find the caption that will help your vaccine insta post go — we’re sorry to do this — viral.

by Raleigh McCool and Lyndsay Rush

• Start with your birth month in numeric form.
• Multiply that by how many doses you received.
• Subtract that by the number of people you are going to make out with on your first night out.
• If you are married, dating, or Brian McKnight, start back at one, and add how many drinks you are going to have on your first night out.
• Do some math, match your total with the list below, and then post away! You only get one shot at sharing this big news (okay, maybe two), and we’re here to help you make it count.

1. Did it for the memories.
2. She/he/they shots, she/he/they scores!
3. “You only get one shot!” — Eminem & Eminem
4. This is my *poke* face.
5. Felt vaccinated, might delete later.
6. Lost my v-card today.
7. I woke up like this: vaccinated.
8. Prick me with your best shot.
9. Shoot for the immune, even if you miss you’ll land among the bars.
10. Vax on vax on vax.
11. Side effects may include: looking cute getting the vaccine.
12. That’s some WAP — Wonderful-Ass Pfizer.
13. Catching feelings, not COVID.
14. Not to be a prick, but this happened today.
15. Drop it like it’s shot.
16. I only love Moderna and my momma, I’m sorry.
17. Confidence level: Johnson AND Johnson.
18. Them’s the vax!
19. Arm-care Expert with Vax Shepard
20. *Terminator voice* I’ll be vaxed.
21. Vaxstreet’s back, alright!
22. Chillin’ out vax and relaxin’ all cool.
23. Shot-ty wanna ride with me?
24. Now watch me whip, watch me vaccinae-nae.
25. You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.
26. We are we are, the youth of the vacci-nation.
27. I did a thing.